Contentment

Hi everyone! It has been way too long since I have written a blog post and honestly, I missed it. For the most part, I use my IG account to share my everyday life (or as much as I think I should share). All that to say, I really wanted to share a small part of the current season I am in.

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I feel like most people think I am living my best life simply because I am in the city of many dreams, the city of the creatives, the city of angels. And do not, seriously, get me wrong, I love being here. BUT. Everything in life comes at a cost. Whether Christian or not, there are sacrifices you have to make and decisions you have to choose in order to move forward.

So… This last season I have endured probably the toughest test of my faith (still am). I am not the strongest person in the bunch, but what I am finding is that as long as I am standing on God’s word, I can withstand anything. Some would dare to say withstanding the hits of life makes you weak; you should protect yourself, fight back, do all that you can to make it work, etc. etc. but honestly there is only so much you can do on your own that at a very opportune time, you will crack. And I have.

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It all started at the end of February, when I had a crazy feeling I would need to transition from my current job then to another. I ignored the feeling, tried to ride the wave, and boom. On March 29th I was laid off.

Compared to most popular reactions, I was very excited to not be a part of the company because I disliked my position. I was not growing and I was simply not thriving in my skills or talents. Like anyone would, I began to apply to jobs I was most certainly qualified for (or at least I thought) and got a few calls back.

Interview after interview, I did not receive any follow up and did not land a thing. Month after month, I cried and waited and prayed, and doubted, and feared, and you can only imagine. I was near depression. Those 3 long months of April, May, and June without a job IN LOS ANGELES have been the hardest. I was stressed. For sure not financially stable. I had to catch rides in order to save gas. Did I mention my car had the most issues during those three months, totaling up to more than my rent??? I even had to ask my younger brother to help me pay a bill I just could not afford.

Most of you know that I like to think things through (sometimes too long) when making decisions and man… staying in LA has been the hardest yet most growing choice I have made. During that dark time of my life, I have evolved into a passionate, relentless woman who believes the impossible can still happen despite circumstance.

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I now work part time, thank God, but it is still hard. Trying to get out of debt and feed myself on a budget is VERY hard. But you know what, I simply want to share this reality because it is not always what it seems. I used to be so open about my wounds and pains in the past, but recently I have only shared highlights of LA living because I felt shame in the reality I am in. Of course, not everyone needs to know the details of my life, but I do believe that by being real in the process I can absolutely encourage someone in a similar situation.

Throughout this time, I have learned that my contentment cannot be established in a job, people with access, money, or possessions. I have developed the most raw and organic way to Jesus’ heart by being very very very open with how I have felt and I would not trade those beautiful moments with Him for any career. My soul is refreshed with His sweet reminders of old promises I forgot about and I cannot wait to see them unfold.

 

During this time though, I have been working on my personal brand, and a project that is very dear to my heart. You will soon know about this so stay tuned!

Until the pre-view… #LiveLimitless.

❤ Tima G.

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